Wednesday, August 26, 2009


For those of us who are parents, it can sure be difficult sending our children off to school each day! No matter how old they are or what grade they are in we have to trust that they are safe and being cared for properly by the teachers and staff members with whom they will now spend most of their waking hours over the next 9 months. These days we have to worry if they will catch some deadly virus while in school, be physically assaulted or get shot by some drug crazed lunatic.
Now let me just say that I am not the overly emotional kind of mom who cries at her child's preschool graduation(when did these start anyways?) I didn't even cry when they started Kindergarten. Instead I was filled with excitement and joy that they would be learning new things and making new friends. In fact, I love to see their faces light up with each new accomplishment throughout the school year. Where am I leading with all of this? Well.... let me start with the fact that my children attend a public school. The one they attend is a fairly new school with wonderful facilities, in an affluent area with a pretty good(overall) staff. And it has a superb amount of parental involvement. The teacher/student ratio is probably average for a public school, not great...but not bad either. My youngest child in school just started the first grade this year and is my little math whiz. This kid has always LOVED working with numbers! In kindergarten the rest of the class learned how to add single digit numbers (2+2=4 ) while my child was adding things like (124 + 547) and carrying numbers already. We of course spoke with the teacher about this and were told that because of "NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND" they can only teach at the pace of the slowest student in the class basically. We decided to just keep working with our child at home and figured it was no big deal was after all---Kindergarten. But now it is the First Grade and my math whiz can do simple multiplication already.(Our 3rd grade child is just learning this)
And yesterday my First grader came home and said(with a very deflated look) " Mom, during free time in class today I added 5 columns of 3 digit numbers ( example: 345+269+123+831+278=) and when I showed my teacher,the only thing she said was "Good for you!" She didn't even look at it." First of all..... What child do you know who CHOOSES to spend their" free" time doing math, while the other kids are busy coloring and trading Pokemon cards, and the teacher doesn't even notice? REALLY?
Now one look at the utter disappointment on my child's face just made me want to cry!!! And in the same moment I was seeing RED and knew that I would just like to strangle that teacher!(And the year has just begun) Of course, I told my child that she was probably just really busy at that moment.... with lot's of teacher stuff. (YEAH RIGHT) The problem now is that I can't see any point to charging in there and confronting her about her lack of concern with my child's excitement to learn (even though I obviously feel that she could have handled things MUCH better). I surely don't want to do anything to cause the teacher to dislike my child. But I feel that it is my child who is suffering because of NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND!!! I also feel that it is ridiculous that there is not any sort of "Gifted and Talented" learning for students in the public school system where we live until 3rd grade. Since we cannot afford private school and I don't have the patience to home school my children, I am not sure where this leaves me. I guess when my anger with the teacher subsides a bit, I will be able to figure out a strategy or solution for the whole issue. For my child's sake I hope so!!

And what you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses, commit to faithful men who will be able to teach others also.
2 TIMOTHY 2: 2

Monday, August 24, 2009

Playing With Fire

Why is it that some people, from the time they are very young, will tend to want to see just how much they can get away with? Exactly how far they can push the limits in life before there is a repercussion? While still others are able to be satisfied from an early age with following the rules they are given. These tendencies or character traits exist for many well into their adult lives and are often lifelong. Case in point: I have always been somewhat of a rule follower. The "goody two shoes" in the family who did what she was supposed to. Never skipped school, didn't cheat on tests, didn't do drugs, didn't even let a boy "past First base" until I was 19!
My younger brother, on the other hand, has always been an extreme risk taker. He has continually gone out of his way since childhood(which he is still in... at age 33) to break all of the rules with absolutely no fear of any consequence. He is always metaphorically "playing with fire". We are two completely opposite personalities! Don't get me wrong...I love him very much, but I sometimes wonder how we even came from the same womb! I mean... we definitely had the same parents and lived under the same roof with the same set of rules and the same punishments for disobedience. But after all of these years, I am still the one pretty much living life on the straight and narrow, while my brother lives his life on the edge. And I mean really REALLY close to that edge, where he may eventually fall into a hole so deep that nobody will be able to rescue him. I sometimes wonder if this is really what these types of people, like my brother, are secretly longing for. They feel that they just have to keep playing with fire until they get burned. And then of course...when they do get wasn't their fault....NO of course not! Someone else is to blame.
I guess the only thing that gives me some solace when I think of my brother's fate in life, is the knowledge that the Bible is filled with unsavory characters who managed to be redeemed. Several of which were even found right in the bloodline of Jesus. Amazing!! Who knows? It may just be all of those irresponsible, limit testing- rule breakers that get into heaven someday, while all of the prideful, brown- noser's are left behind!

"Note this: some are last who will be first, and some are first who will be last."
LUKE 13: 30

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Paradise Lost

It is late in the day and unlike the serenity in the adjacent photo which was taken in Paradise(otherwise known as St. John, U.S.V.I.) the afternoon heat has sparked a few rain showers. Summer is nearing its end and this always seems to bring on a sort of melancholy mood for me. I believe the clinical term for this is
seasonal depression. Although the rain is not helping matters any! So in order to attempt to make myself feel better, I was flipping through photos of my kids. Most of which certainly brought a smile to my face, but then I started to notice how much they have grown. Which of course makes me sad that they are growing so fast and depressed that I am getting O-L-D and now I think I feel even worse than I did in the first place! But I paused to look at this picture which was taken on our last trip to St. John about a year ago. My husband and I were married there in 1998 and it is our favorite place to visit. So...normally...looking at any picture taken there or even one that reminds me of St. John cheers me right up. But not this time of course. For two reasons...(#1) We were married in a beautiful, "eco-friendly" resort on the island called Maho Bay. This is where we usually stay when we visit St. John. We have even taken our children there twice and they love it too! 2011 Maho Bay will close....forever ! The property has been leased for twenty some odd years, the lease expired, and the property owners are selling. And if this isn't just about enough to make me cry...just wait 'til you hear the next part. reason (#2) When we last visited St. John, it was for our 10th wedding anniversary. And the night that we celebrated this, my husband surprised me with sunset dinner reservations to the same restaurant where we dined on our wedding night appropriately named Paradiso. Only this time ...we had our children with us and it was very special, as you can probably imagine! husband usually finds it sort of difficult to do anything considered to be "romantic". But on this occasion....he went all out! He really surprised me after we had finished our meal by having one of our children hand me a card and the other one placed a small box on the table in front of me. When I opened the box, I found it contained a gorgeous platinum anniversary ring encrusted with beautiful ,colored sapphire stones. I never knew that sapphires came in all the colors of the rainbow! This was truly many-a-woman's dream come true. A week in paradise with prince charming, angelic children and JEWELS to boot!!! Here's the sickening part....the reason that I couldn't smile today when I happened to see the picture of my Paradise staring back at me from my computer....About a week ago.....I lost the ring!!! That's right!.....LOST it . Don't have the faintest clue where. Can't remember the last place that I might have taken it off. Have searched high and low ring! And yes....then...came the real fun part.... I had to T_E_L_L my husband that I lost the ring. He was surprisingly calm about the whole thing. Probably because he could see how sick I was over it. UGH!!!!
So... for now, I can only hope and pray that my ring will eventually miraculously appear, and with any luck maybe Oprah or someone will buy the property at Maho Bay and keep my favorite spot in paradise from being lost too! Atleast it looks like the rain has stopped and the sun is coming back out.

And He said to him, "I assure you:
Today you will be with Me in paradise."

LUKE 23: 43

Wednesday, August 19, 2009


Friends.....this is what I am feeling compelled to write about today. I think it is funny that we are truly never completely sure who our real friends are. No matter how long they may have been in our lives. By "real" I mean the kind of friend who is always looking out for us...not just themselves. The kind of friend who not only doesn't get involved in idol gossip about their "friends", but isn't afraid step up and defend that same friend in their absence.
Now some people are lucky, they have friends that they have known all of their lives...they went through school together....survived the trials of puberty together....entered into the responsibilities of adulthood.... together... and are still the best of friends. These friends may be real. But they can still surprise us sometimes turning out to be our enemies, even after so many years. I was not one of those "lucky" ones just mentioned. My family moved CONSTANTLY! "Military brats" aint got nothin' on me. My parents were musicians during the 60's and 70's . They traveled from town to town and state to state looking for "gigs". Sometimes they took me with them. Other times I was left to live with "friends" for months on end, so that I could attend school. This kind of vagabond childhood made it impossible for me to keep friends of my own. I do, however, have a few "close" friends who have been in my life since my early adult years. One in particular has been a friend (almost like a sister) now for 20 years. Our friendship survived living together as roommates when we were young and single....moving to different parts of the country with our respective careers....each of us getting married( to men which we both thought were not good enough for our friend)....and now having children. But after all of these years we have come to a place where it is no longer guaranteed that our friendship will continue. This truly breaks my heart! I cannot believe it, even as I am writing these words. But make a long story short...I was right! The man she married wasn't good enough for her. He's now divorcing her after 13 years for "the other woman". Inspite of the fact that they have a 5 year old child together. And my friend (understandably heartbroken) has decided to give up.....on everything! Life....her child...her family...and finally(this is where I come in).....her friends. I am sure that given time....she will probably come to her senses and regain her strength and will hopefully realize that she has driven away all of those who actually DO care because of the one who didn't. In the meantime I am left to ponder the fact that a friendship which once seemed unbreakable, may be at an end after all of these years. But then.... much to my surprise, I have recently become very good friends with someone whom I once considered a foe. Wonders never cease!

The wounds of a friend are trustworthy,
but the kisses of an enemy are excessive.

Saturday, August 15, 2009


I find it truly amazing the unexpected turns that our lives can sometimes take. As I sat this morning watching my two older children fishing from our dock, laughing and jumping with delight at each new catch and my littlest one was cheering them on from a cushy spot beneath the shade of our porch. It was like a scene straight out of a Norman Rockwell painting. Just good old fashioned fun and entertainment! My thoughts drifted to a day about a year and a half ago
when my spirits were at their absolute lowest. I had just completed a half marathon and achieved my personal best time in 10 years running a local 10K race. I was gearing up to begin training for a full marathon . Now for those of you who are the athletic, energetic type...this may not phase you. But I had never really enjoyed exercise of any particular sort. In fact my husband had been nagging me to join his gym for years. I emphatically refused!! My children were no longer babies, as my youngest then was about to start kindergarten. So I had plenty of spare time on my hands. But I would be the one to decide when I would lose the" baby" weight and where and how!!! Well ...I did it....I found a bridge nearby which I actually enjoyed walking over, joined my local Curves gym for women, and within about 3 months I lost 35 lbs. I was in the best shape of my adult life!! And I had so many friends who said that they had been encouraged themselves by my success. The funny thing is that I was so touched by the effect that I was having on others that I actually prayed for God to show me a "purpose" for my running. I thought perhaps a charity running event or the Susan G. Komen "Race for a Cure"....something like that. But His answer to my prayers was something else ....indeed! Three days after running in the 10K, I woke up not quite feeling like myself. I couldn't put my finger on it but I knew something was different. I went for a good 4 mile walk and when I finished it hit me. I had not had my menstrual cycle that month. I had been so busy getting ready for the race that I had not even noticed. I hurried to the nearest pharmacy, bought the needed test, and rushed right home to take it. And suspicions were confirmed..... I was pregnant!! My head was spinning! I began sobbing convulsively. How could this be? Another baby.. my age...(41) which should definitely be too old for that! I mean there are women all over the world my age trying TRYING to get pregnant. And I did it by accident? I started crying even harder when I realized that the "running" thing was marathon....none of the eagerly anticipated spare time I had been looking forward to with both kids in school. And the best part...puttin' back on the lbs. That day a funny thing happened though . I was so depressed and I just didn't know what to do with myself. I didn't yet have the nerve to tell my husband about our new "gift" and I wasn't comfortable with the idea of confiding in any of my close friends about this gossip worthy tidbit. But I remembered that a woman named Darnell, whom I barely knew from my gym and who also happened to be a member of my church, had been asking me for months if I would like to volunteer my time to help with some cause that involved making blankets for the needy. I had not really been interested but didn't want to seem impolite. However, on this day I figured "what else do I have to do?"-- " where else can I go right now?"So I agreed to meet her and help out. Now I want you to listen closely to what I can only say now was GOD working at his absolute best!!! When I arrived, there were about 20 or so women there.. of all ages.. working fastidiously. Making blankets in several different colors...but all were for BABIES!!! I couldn't believe it! As I sat there making blanket after blanket, I was suddenly feeling better somehow about my own little bundle of joy that I was carrying. I confided in Darnell that I had just discovered I was 41. She wasn't shocked or disgusted, however, as I had expected ,which also made me feel better. Now what were the odds that I would end up there, in that place, at that moment when I needed it the most? Phenomenal!! I still have a small blanket which Darnell insisted I should keep that day.
Fast forward....a year and a half later....A few weeks ago this story came full circle when I was walking through an arts and crafts fair with my family some 300 miles from where I live. I noticed a woman who I knew looked strikingly familiar. But I couldn't figure out for the life of me where I knew her from. Suddenly as she was walking away, I remembered....Darnell! I called out to her, and as she turned around her eyes flew open wide in surprise . She had a huge grin as she reached to touch my baby on the hand. No words were necessary. We both knew that God had worked yet another miracle.
So there I sat on the porch this morning, with my beautiful unexpected little gift from God just next to me in a high chair. My older two kids were fishing on the dock and the baby was smiling and squealing cheerfully at their activities. I am so thankful now that I have this wonderful child in my life when I had thought that I just wanted a medal for running in a silly marathon. With Summer winding down now and the kids starting back to school next week I am hoping to get myself motivated to once again begin exercising....with the baby, of course! I am running a marathon of a different sort these days...but who knows....maybe I'll run in a real one too someday. I certainly am now convinced that anything is possible!!

"Follow me," Jesus told them, "and I will make you fish for people!"
MARK 1: 17

Friday, August 14, 2009


As children we were all bound to have challenged the rules from time to time. Pushing the limits to see just how far we could get before our parents would react to whatever mischief we were creating. As I am now a parent myself, I find it very difficult at times to know how to discipline my children. My own parents were fairly strict and were never afraid to break off the nearest switch from a tree or bring out the belt. In fact, when I was a teen they used a paddle(2 x 4) made of cypress. It even had a name....BERTHA!
My step-dad would actually make me retrieve it from its place in the closet when it was about to be used. These days using any of the above as a means of punishment would definitely be considered by many as a form of child abuse. Let me make this clear right is not the form of punishment used for my own children. My husband and I have tried just about every other means, however, to reign them in. "Time out"or "the naughty chair"--never worked for us. They would simply sit there with smug looks on their little faces, humming their favorite tune until the time was up. Taking away privileges like t.v. or playtime only seems to get us so far. These days we send them to bed early, which has some effect since they don't want to miss out on any fun that the sibling is having. But just this morning I was so frustrated by the behavior of my oldest child that I found myself threatening to throw away or donate every single toy or game in the house!!! I'd had it with the disobedience!! Of course the problem with this sort of threat is that my child knows that it's a punishment which would most likely not be carried out. So where does that leave me? I don't know, but I can certainly understand where my own parents were coming from , now. I guess I'll just have to keep praying that my children will eventually learn to follow the rules....before they drive me insane.

Lord do not punish me in Your anger or discipline me in Your wrath. PSALM 38: 1

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

We Were The Griswalds

If you are reading this and have no idea who the Griswards are, then you have probably never seen the movie "National Lampoons Vacation" starring Chevy Chase as Clark Griswald. If this is the case, then you may not quite be able to picture the scenarios which were to unfold for me recently during my families own vacation. My husband and I have always been a "fly by the seat of your pants" type of couple. Impulsiveness is one of the many things we have in common. Through the years we have taken many a trip without any advanced reservations, no mapped agenda...we just go. It has made for some very interesting vacations. So when my hubby recently asked if I was up for a road trip to Cades Cove, an area we had both heard holds some of the most beautiful, unspoiled natural wilderness in the country...of course, I thought it sounded like a great idea! In a perfect world we would have dropped all 3 of the kids at Granny's house for a nice weekend away. But as this is not possible( all grandparents deceased) we loaded up the car and were on our way. O.K. actually we took my husbands truck, which we thought would be better for carrying the million or so items that are necessary ...really...with a baby on board. The smaller bags were packed here and there around the kids inside the cab, bigger stuff in the back(outside). We were loaded to the hilt!! All for what would only be a two or three night trip.
The plan as my husband laid it out was to take a nice relaxing drive(about 3 hours) through the mountains of North Carolina toward Gatlinburg, Tennessee. We would spend a night or two there, taking in the sights, before moving on to Cades Cove.
Things got off key right from the start when I realized that in the rush to pack I had forgotten several actual necessities... like toothbrushes and toothpaste. No big deal we could always stop at a grocery store along the way. We found the perfect place to stop after an hour on the road. And since the kids were already driving us both crazy ...bickering over toys, fussing, whining and complaining...we all unloaded and went in. I figured the two older kids could stretch their legs, release some energy and maybe get a snack. We put the baby in the cart and proceeded to load it with way more stuff ...of course...than we needed. When we got to the checkout line, my hubby realized he didn't have enough cash in his pocket to pay for it all. I volunteered to walk out to the truck and get some more money from his wallet. When I returned, the cashier had just finished ringing up our items, my husband gave her the money and he pushed the cart toward the exit. ( I know by now you are yawning...wondering where I'm going with see this is where we had our best "Griswald" moment!) We were about half way to the truck when a man came running after us yelling "Maam, Sir.... Wait! Wait! You forgot something!" We both turned around to find that the item we had forgotten was.......THE BABY !! Yes, that's right. We each had thought that the other one... HAD the baby. It was an innocent mistake and the people in the store were laughing their heads off but of course it made me think. "What if " they hadn't noticed the baby there before we got in the car and left? I'm sure that we probably would have realized something was missing. But in the meantime maybe they would have thought we had purposely abandoned the baby. They could have called social services. I was just sick to my stomach at the thought! My husband of course tried to lighten things up by joking..."It's o.k. ....We've got 2 spare heirs". "Funny ha-ha" , I retorted.
So " The Griswalds" were once again back on the road. Headed toward Gatlinberg....only two hours to go. We were following a road map for North Carolina that my husband said should be able to get us there...even though our destination was in Tennessee. My husband took a scenic highway which was actually dotted with some incredibly beautiful overlooks. But somewhere along the way we decided that we had missed an important exit to get to Gatlinberg. We had driven for 3 hours and weren't there yet! As we continued driving along we noticed the "scenic" road didn't seem to have any exits... no gas stations, no restrooms etc. And yes, you guessed it.... the truck was now dangerously low on fuel...on narrow, sharply winding roads and the best was almost dark!!! My husband had to literally "coast" whenever we were on any downhill curves in hopes of makin' it to a gas station. Finally we made it, by the skin of our teeth, to an exit. "Clark Griswald" had saved the day!! But we were now way off course and were actually closer to Cades Cove than Gatlinburg. So hubby decided we would drive through Cades Cove first. Now it was almost dark by the time we got there. Which is optimal time for viewing the wildlife, which consisted of turkeys, lots of deer, geese and black bears all roaming free . But it is an 11 mile drive through the Preserve and since it was a weekend, at the end of summer....the drive was bumper to bumper. Cars barely moving. People stopping to take pictures. Don't get me wrong....we truly loved seeing Cades Cove. But we weren't half way through it before darkness came upon us. And now, we were stuck... in a long line of cars... in the dark.. with nothing to see and no way out! Also... there was the fact that we had no reservations for a room and the nearest hotel.....miles away! By the time we exited the Preserve we had been in the car for about 8 hours...with a baby. And finally decided --enough is enough!!!
So we spent the next hour or so listening to a screaming baby, praying that there would be a hotel around each turn in the road. such luck!! And of course we had long since scarfed down all the snacks and the older kids were (understandably)whining once again about being hungry. After what seemed like forever and a day later, we finally found our way to Gatlinburg. It was about 10 o'clock at night by the time we found a place to stay that was decent and had availability. But we were O-U-T of that truck!!! And I refused to drive anywhere the next day. Luckily Gatlinburg is the perfect town for.....not driving. Plenty to see and do all within walking distance to any hotel in town. And the kids LOVED it!!! There were about 5 or 6 different Ripley's kids attractions, a bunch of toy stores, an aquarium, putt-putt(indoors and out) , a gondola ride up the mountain, and of course our hotel had a great pool!!
Two days later we were ready to attempt the driving thing again...back home. We made it in about half the time, of course.... with the proper directions.
Would I do it again? Probably....but next time hopefully with a little planning, at least, and a proper map!!!

My people are lost sheep; their shepherds have led them astray,
guiding them the wrong way in the mountains. They have
wandered from mountain to hill; they have forgotten their resting place.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

A Bold Creek Runs Through It

Taking leave from the intense summer heat and humidity along the coast where we live, we often travel to our cabin in the mountains. Nestled in the heart of the Blue Ridge Mountains, above a nice flowing creek, dotted by waterfalls and rhododendron plants, it has become my favorite escape. It is located on a densely wooded parcel, in a somewhat secluded area, just
outside of the quaint little town of Burnsville, N.C. This town has just the right amount of amenities to offer and alot of old time charm to go along with it. You will often spy local folks there pruning their well planted gardens or just sitting for a spell beneath the cool shade of their front porches. But they always take the time to wave a friendly hello to passersby.
The thing that I have come to enjoy the most about our visits there is that everything is low key! There is no t.v., no phone, no nintendo ds, and the nearest neighbor is about 1/4 mile away so it is quite peaceful. It seems as though we are living in a different era when we are there. We sit in our rockers on the porch listening to and enjoying the quietness. The only noises are provided by nature. Birds chirping, squirrels jumping from limb to limb high above and the tranquil sounds of the waterfall in the distance. Now this is how God intended life to be.....peaceful. The kids have a great time too! They play cards, boardgames and enjoy going on hikes through the woods and along the creekbed collecting shiny mica stones which glisten up to them from beneath the water. My husband and I also find more time to enjoy these things
as well as reading books and listening to the radio. The local station that we receive there only plays a mix of country, bluegrass, and old Christian hymns. I find it amusing, however, that they also broadcast a "Lost and Found" for pets...saying " Black dog wearing green collar found yesterday up by Old Pond road." And they have a "Yard sale" listing..."Hey folks there's Two Queen sized beds and a tractor for 555-2078." But my favorite is the radio Obituaries.
" Emma Sweeting passed to the good Lord yesterday in her home town of Micaville. She was 82 years old. A lifelong resident she worked at the Clips and Curls salon in town for 40 years. She enjoyed singing in the choir in church on Sundays and is survived by......"
I have to smile at the charm and simplicity of it all. Perhaps this is why when I find myself quite often in the middle of something tedious or frustrating at home...(You know the normal 15 loads of laundry, kids fighting over t.v. channels, and the phone ringing off of the hook)...I begin to long to return to our place in the mountains.

A cheerful heart is a good medicine
But a downcast spirit dries up the bones.

Monday, August 3, 2009

Where The Grass Is Always Greener

Why is it that no matter what kind of life we live, we always yearn for something more? Something bigger, better, easier, or just different than what we've got. And we always feel it's out there somewhere, waiting for us...just beyond our grasp. Are we really just one lottery ticket away from true happiness? Somehow, I don't think so.
Surely the person out there who seems to have it all is secretly longing for something too.
Personally, I am very blessed that I am living the life now that I had always dreamed of. I am happily married to a wonderful man( the first marriage for us both) and we now have 3 beautiful children.My husband and I both grew up in similar circumstances. I grew up as what many refer to as "poor white trash".He was maybe a step or two above at the lower end of middle class. Through a lot of hard work and some very sound financial decisions we both broke away from our meager beginnings. We now own a very nice home(paid for) in a good area with great neighbors. My husband works from home(a very relaxed schedule) and I am a stay at home mom. So our children have the full undivided attention of two parents....a rarity these days. We are basically living what some would say is the "American Dream". We live near the coast(20 minute drive to the beach).We actually live on a river. So we have a dock in our back yard where my husband can park any one of his 3 boats(paid for). He loves boats!! We also have a cabin up in the mountains on a bold stream about a 6 hour drive from the coast. This is where we flee to when the summer heat and humidity becomes too miserable. Oh and because I am a retired flight attendant, we have the ability to fly for free( space available) almost anywhere in the U.S. and some of Europe too.
Now I know that right about now you may be rolling your eyes....I promise I am not telling you this simply for the purpose of boasting about how great my life is. But get this.....a few nights ago on the drive home from visiting my husbands cousin, who is sick with cancer, we stopped for gas and hubby comes back with a lottery ticket. He only buys them when the Powerball jackpot goes above $100 million or so. He likes to play this game(so to speak) where we sit and dream about what we would do if we won. His dream own a nice 70 ft. trawler( boat). Next we sit and think about all of the places we could visit on this newer, bigger boat. They all sound great to me as long as it is somewhere warm and tropical. I like beaches! The Virgin Islands is my favorite place to visit. We actually got married there with 22 of our closest friends and relatives 11 years ago.

But it hit me like a ton of bricks the other night, how sad it is that people nature...just are never completely happy with what they are given in life. We always want more! The guy out there who owns the trawler that my husband salivates over is dreaming of the 100 ft. Nordhaven. But then he's also gotta have a bigger dock to park it at. Where does it end?


Do not desire your neighbor's wife or covet your neighbor's house, his field, his male or female slave, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.

Sunday, August 2, 2009


I would like to know when it is o.k. to exhale and say " after this number of years of marriage...we are safe from divorce". I have been married now for 11 1/2 years to my first and hopefully only husband. And even though we have had our fair share of trials to overcome, I feel that we are on pretty good footing these days. I might even say we are the closest now that we have been in years. Which surprises me because we just endured a rather large challenge to the foundation of our marriage when our third child was born recently. You see, as my hubby likes to tell everyone, we had two children... a girl...and a boy...and we were done""!!! But here we are with our third, quite unexpected" little blessing" and as my husband says "we can qualify for free checking soon"....he turns 50 this December. I had worried, initially that the stress from this pregnancy and all of the bills which came along with it, would possibly be our breaking point. Due to my advanced age, 41 at the time, we had to have all kinds of special testing done(we are still getting the bills from this), at the insistence of my OB/GYN, to eliminate the possibility of any serious birth defects. Everything checked out fine... and we proceeded. I can't honestly tell you what decisions we might have made if the results had been different. But with my perfectly beautiful youngest child sitting next to me right now, I can say that I am glad that we didn't have to find out. Marriage is not ever easy! But I always thought growing up that once two people had been married for a long time, they stayed that way! I didn't base this assumption on the example set by my own parents, however, as they had divorced when I was 10 years old. And this occurred to me yesterday parents had been married for 12 years when they separated. So I guess I can't exhale yet! And the really scary thing is that a few years ago.... a woman that I know, who had been married for about 35 years shared fears that her own relationship had struggled in recent years. I mean....really... 35 yrs...and still not surely safe? Well maybe it's just me, but I think that if I manage to put up with my husband for that long(4 decades) and he then decides to leave me ...after that many years.... he'd better get some really good runnin' shoes! I can't say I wouldn't want to kill him!!