Ever since having kids, I have had one problem which just doesn't seem to get any better. Many of us moms have this same problem in common. No- time-for-me. NONE!! We can't go to the restroom without being interrupted for goodness sake! Can't even get dressed without- someone-barging in on us. And , take a shower....what is that? I haven't even been writing this post for two minutes and I have had to stop 5 times. But this blog site is one of only 3 things that I do on a regular basis- that is ---just for me! What are the other two things you might wonder?
Well...let me start at the beginning. A couple of years ago my husband and I couldn't seem to solve this issue which we were having with each other which often resulted in huge disagreements. You see, he is a stay at home dad,just as I am a stay at home mom. Our children are very lucky. But several days a week he would go into town to run "errands" ,you know.... important stuff like... go to the bank, post office, grocery store etc....followed by a few other stops to places like...Barnes & Noble, the movies, or to lunch with a buddy. And let's not forget the all important game of... GOLF! Meanwhile ...I had to beg....yes... B_E_G for him to watch our- then...2 ...children(now we have 3) so that I could go somewhere..ANYWHERE....it really didn't matter. And at first, I would go sit through some chick flick, by myself(and movies aren't cheap these days). Or go window shopping, which sometimes cost me more $$ than I had planned. And then my hubby would complain about the" expense" of my free time.To which I would respond(inwardly) "AND YOUR GOLF GAME COSTS HOW MUCH?"
So...here comes that other thing that I do -just for me. I joined the church choir. YAY! I was singing for the Lord ...for free!....and getting my "ME" time too!! I thought, surely this will work. Well, almost. See , the choir rehearses 1 time a week for their 1 performance each month. And somehow-without really complaining- my husband manages to let me know that this is an imposition for him to have to watch the children. AND>>> God forbid we have a concert performance too, with the choir.
The third thing that I sometimes do...go to the gym.BIG FUN!! SO..... it really REALLY PEAVES me that he actually has- the- nerve to complain about my blogging. He says things like..."don't worry kids, mom will get to making supper when she finishes blogging". And now my oldest child even says to me, "Mom, are you blogging... AGAIN??" (with attitude) Well to quote an old movie....."GOD AS MY WITNESS".......I WILL NOT QUIT THIS!! So , my followers, stay tuned.....pleeeeease!
SCRIPURE OF THE DAY
Sing praise to God, sing praise;
sing praise to our King, sing praise!
PSALM 47: 6
Don't worry! We are all entitled in some "Me Time" and we will not desert you! So, just keep blogging away! Put the kids into a playpen, or give them some jobs to "Help Mommy Out" while you have your work to do!
ReplyDeleteMake Him take the kids out for the afternoon so you can catch up on said Work!
Blogging is a full time job and is not to be taken lightly!
Ha ha fight for your rights. Parent hood is equally shared. You are not going to be happy if aren't able to have a life of you own. Just a few hours a week, shouldn't be that hard. Make it happen we are rooting for you.
ReplyDeleteYes you go girl.., let hubby know you are entitled to 'me' time too and that he's setting a bad example for the kids ...(he is reason-able isn't he?). Take it easy
ReplyDeleteGod Bless your family.
BM
great blog and I am a follower since finding you!
ReplyDeleteHi Mom
ReplyDeleteit sounds to me as if you and your beloved need to sit down and talk this one through...maybe make a list of priorities, of family activities, and then a list of things you do together and a list of things you each like to do independently and see if there is a balance that seems fair.
I can feel resentment in your voice and comments and from experience I can tell you that resentment starts to get a very bitter taste. Be assertive - that doesn't mean bossy or bitchy or naggy, it means stating your position with respect for him and yourself...
A marriage is a partnership with equal rights and responsibilities(whist roles may differ), both partners need to have their needs met.
Happy days and good luck
I really enjoy your blog. I was once like your husband and get annoyed at my wife about the time she would spend on the net or she wanted to do something herself. I learned the hard way by seeing my wife get very sick because of stress because she could release her tension. Since then we have longs chats about what we want in our marriage and I have to say that now our marriage has been the strongest ever because I got a real kick up the butt seeing my wife get really sick. Never give up the things you enjoy because you need that release. Never feel guiltily about doing things you like. I hope this comment doesn't make you depressed, I really just wanted to show you that there is a light at the end of the tunnel and not to give up what makes you happy.
ReplyDelete