Friday, August 14, 2009

SPARE THE WHIP , SPOIL THE CHILD?

As children we were all bound to have challenged the rules from time to time. Pushing the limits to see just how far we could get before our parents would react to whatever mischief we were creating. As I am now a parent myself, I find it very difficult at times to know how to discipline my children. My own parents were fairly strict and were never afraid to break off the nearest switch from a tree or bring out the belt. In fact, when I was a teen they used a paddle(2 x 4) made of cypress. It even had a name....BERTHA!
My step-dad would actually make me retrieve it from its place in the closet when it was about to be used. These days using any of the above as a means of punishment would definitely be considered by many as a form of child abuse. Let me make this clear right now...it is not the form of punishment used for my own children. My husband and I have tried just about every other means, however, to reign them in. "Time out"or "the naughty chair"--never worked for us. They would simply sit there with smug looks on their little faces, humming their favorite tune until the time was up. Taking away privileges like t.v. or playtime only seems to get us so far. These days we send them to bed early, which has some effect since they don't want to miss out on any fun that the sibling is having. But just this morning I was so frustrated by the behavior of my oldest child that I found myself threatening to throw away or donate every single toy or game in the house!!! I'd had it with the disobedience!! Of course the problem with this sort of threat is that my child knows that it's a punishment which would most likely not be carried out. So where does that leave me? I don't know, but I can certainly understand where my own parents were coming from , now. I guess I'll just have to keep praying that my children will eventually learn to follow the rules....before they drive me insane.

SCRIPTURE OF THE DAY
Lord do not punish me in Your anger or discipline me in Your wrath. PSALM 38: 1

4 comments:

  1. The other side of love is obedience. Your blog is very nice. The images are very beautiful. God is Great. Best wishes.
    http://www.thedynamicnature.com

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  2. This is an interesting post, becos it baffled me too. Perhaps children today are simply smarter than we think.

    I pray for God's blessings everyday to keep me sane. We need more of that. Cheerz.

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  3. We've used positive discipline methods - but once in a while have witheld toys or priveledges. This works for one child but not the other. Oftn just talking about how upset or disappointed we are has worked to change behaviours. Threats only work if you carry them through - if they don't believe the toys will be gone they won't. So make sure that you mean what you say too!

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  4. I posted a comment last night and it seems to have diappeared (before Niqi). ..
    Spare, don't spoil, go with instinct.
    There's no 1 solution, we may not be sure on what to do, but we do know what not to do. If my child still wants to hug me at the end of the day after some discipline, then I think I've done alright. If not wait to see if you get a good morning. I have to be versatile and try to outsmart the kids, but good old fashion nagging does have its' merits so I've learnt. Let's learn from each other.

    Pray, tomorrow is always a new day, we'll see more antics- new and old, please God keep us sane and ready.

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